40) Kooks

40) Kooks

A Mystery

So there I was, minding my own business (as you do)

When I got a text message

“Reaches for the red phone

Calling peterhero

Calling peterhero”

Which was nice

If a tad unexpected

Considering we had never spoken before

So I tocked back to Kooks, for it was she

And simply said:

“Come”

So she did

Which was nicer still

And a PB for pulling brevity

I just say the word

One word

If its the right word

Said at the right time

In JUST  the right TOV (tone of voice)

Kooks had read my profile on Sugardaddie.com (the best dating site on the planet…so far)

And felt she HAD to call

And I said:

“Come”

And she couldn’t resist

And who could blame her, frankly

So she pulled on her looooong boots

And

Didn’t even do her Hair!!!!!!! (this for the girls, they’ll know what THAT means)

And got in her hot black sports car (I don’t know, they all look the same to me)

And drove

FAST

From Crawley to Chichester (look it up)

Because peterhero had said “Come”

At just the right time time for Kooks

And not a bad time for peterhero frankly

There not being much on TV that night

She said, upon arrival

When I met her outside the back door

And directed her hot, black, sports car

With its’ hot black driver (THEY do NOT all look the same to me – she was Ghana)

Round to the off street parking, and led her through the secret garden, by torchlight

(how COOL, how ROMANTIC is that?)

That she

“Couldn’t help herself

Never done it before”

But that’s the effect my profile has on some girls

And some women

Because Kooks was some flibberty-gibberty slip of a thing

Seduced by my beguiling whiles

Or some such shit

She was a strong, confident, experienced woman

30+

Trinidad (sorry about that)

And

Gorgeous!

So, as I said

Her car pulled up at my front (back) gate

And I led her to my rear access (she likes that)

And through the secret path to the secret door

And

We

KISS

&

KISS SOME MORE

Which was, frankly

LOVELY

…

And she looks around the house

And all my stuff

And LOVES it

And she tells me what I’m going to do to her (rear access not denied)

And she tells me what PRECISELY she is goiung to do to me

BJs

Kooks LOVETH BJs

As I had already discovered

In no uncertain terms

And it was all going VERY WELL

For a first date

Or so I thought, as we lay on the bed

THREE HOURS AFTER THE FIRST TEXT

(Never mind PB,.. Possible National if not WORLD RECORD)

And then

She says she’s going to clear her diary

And get someone to look after the dogs

And she’ll come back the the next day

For seconds

Beeause it is the BEST first date she has EVER had

And because I am the best “LOVER

She has had

EVER

AWESOME

A compliment

I must say

I never tire of hearing

However many times it is said

Which is EVERY TIME

To be honest

Which I always am

And modest

If I say so myself

And so she KISSES me sweetly

Goodnight

And climbs into her tight jeans

And pulls her looong boots back on

And roars of into the night

A Blackbeauty in a Black Car

Fast

To Crawley

And I never

Ever

Hear from her again

Go figure

© peterhero 2012